Kona 2012 - Woodrow Freese
Kona 2012 Race Report
SHORT VERSION
Swam slowly and got chafed… Cycled slowly, peed once, got soaked by the monsoon in Hawi and sunburn on top of the swim chafing… I ran slowly, enjoyed the most beautiful sunset and an astronomer’s dream once the sun went down. The finish line was a blast!
LONG VERSION
This “race report” is long (some might say stupid-long) and more of a free-flowing blog of rambling thoughts leading up to and including race day. If you are looking for the low-down on splits, wattage and/or speed – sorry to disappoint.
It has been said that if the mind is right… the body will follow. I couldn’t agree more.
13 October was everything I wanted it to be and SO much more… it was not about zones, wattage, V dots and/or pace. Yes, I followed the numbers – it provided a series of numeric boundaries so I could cross the finish line with dignity. 13 October was, however, about fulfilling a dream.
Kona is all about racing with the best long-course triathletes in the world. 5 years ago, if this opportunity had come up, I would viewed the “gift” very differently, spending every day swimming, cycling, running and lifting – in preparation to find a smoother stroke – quicker turnover – 10 seconds here - higher cadence - 4 minutes there. I would have spent more money to buy the hottest equipment. I would have hired a swim coach in addition to Masters swimming. I would have raced, trained and traveled more. I would have bulldozed through anything that tried to get in the way of preparing more. And when all was said and done, regardless of finishing time, it would not have been enough.
Not quite two years ago, a series of unfortunate personal events crumbled down around me. Triathlon fueled addictions, masking OCD and depression, among other things, in ways that are difficult to write about. Only recently have I become comfortable is referencing the word “depression” without fear of negative consequences. Simply put – if you haven’t had it, it’s difficult to understand. When the subject first came up, I laughed and assumed that if I swam harder, rode further and ran faster, how could I be “sad?” I was, after all, the life of the party!
To the outside world, I reveled in being a triathlete, followed by being a father, partner and employee. Very little else mattered. Confidence (at times, to the outside world, this was easily confused with cockiness and arrogance) masked a miserable soul that tried to out swim, out ride, and out run issues and challenges. Priorities were so out of kilter, I lost focus of “right and wrong.” Life in the multi-sport fast lane eventually led to the loss of and compromised friendships and relationships - and I was on the brink of disaster.
And while on the edge, I struggled to completely walk away from swimming, cycling and running – as it had become such a part of my life. There were huge gaps in the training log - days with no exercise at all – simply fueling a deeper and different depression. Lake Placid, an event I have participated in each year, served as the proverbial carrot on a stick; I didn’t want to miss a year and break “the streak.” Good grief – in 2004, while working overseas, I traveled from Vietnam to Lake Placid, only to return to Asia two days later, to ensure I didn’t miss a year.
In the midst of this self-imposed chaos, I sought to find purpose of this mess; there had to be something else. Thankfully, my dear partner, Sue, gave us a second chance and made the commitment to work together to get the help I needed. Sue – you are amazing – nothing more… nothing less. Thank you for not giving up on us. I love you.
I would be doing a complete disservice not to mention the importance of Dottie Catlin and her introduction of Endurance Nation. Out of the blue, I received an e-mail, wanting to talk triathlon. We met for lunch – and she was all giddy-like over this new training program called Endurance Nation. It was so foreign/different from the old-school coaching methods I used for 27 years and made no sense to me. Dottie was so hungry and thirsty for tri information – at times, I couldn’t keep up. Dottie’s positive energy and enthusiasm was evenly divided between the pesky mosquito that you want to swat away and the eager little beaver that wanted to do all of the right things! She pushed me to come out and play – instinctively knowing when I needed it most. Dottie – you are a rock star and a great friend – THANK YOU!
Many have heard parts of the story… 29 years of multi-sport racing… before Kona, 26 Ironman finishes… 22 applications for the Kona Lottery… somewhat humorous, when you think about it.
Years ago, finish times were much faster, including a PR of 11:03 in Panama City. As time passed, and challenges began to swallow me, I learned that it was possible to finish an IM with minimal training if one simply gutted it out. The concept of Ironman and “racing” became less important, while other negative aspects of life took over. I focused more on maintaining the LP streak and went about business, showing up in July with minimal fitness.
With a tremendous support network and a small group of close, trustworthy family and friends, I have been able to get past the darkest days. Emotionally and spiritually, I found strength I hadn’t known. Yeah, the finish times have not become faster, but I feel significantly better about what I am doing and why. I feel better about the balance. I have focused time trying to find forgiveness for the relationships I have compromised while offering forgiveness for the negative energy and people in my life.
Fast forward > 15 April – A day I will never forget! 4 p.m. was when I learned that I was going to the Big Dance. Peppered with text messages, e-mail messages and phone calls, I refused to believe this was finally happening until I had a chance to see it for myself.
At first, I set out to be the best I could be in Kona – immediately buying a Garmin 910XT, as a reward for getting into Kona. I ramped up training and focused time, effort and energy I didn’t have. It started to become all about zones, wattage, V dots and/or pace. Thankfully, Sue was there to reel me in and talk me down. If I was going to go to Kona, we had to find and maintain balance.
Fast forward > mid-July - I went to Lake Placid feeling fit. I had a nutrition program that had gone well during race rehearsals and a sound working knowledge of my numbers/zones. I didn’t expect 3 flats! Prepared for 2, I waited and waited and waited for neutral support. And while I wasn’t looking for a Lake Placid PR, I did NOT anticipate a 15:51 day! Emotionally, it was a huge kick in the nuts. I was embarrassed and wanted very little to do with training, let alone think about preparing for Kona.
A couple of weeks passed, with minimal activity. I had to force myself to find energy to complete even the shortest training sessions. And thru this time, I found a renewed sense of balance spending more time with Sue and my beautiful daughter, Keegan – both reminded me that I was doing this for fun and I should enjoy my time in Hawaii. An e-mail from a former teammate reminded me that Kona was a gift and should be embraced as such.
Fast forward > About 10 days before departing for Kona - I received a call from NBC, asking if I was interested in being part of the Ironman telecast. They shared that producers were looking at a new format for the show – where they would feature a “6 Days To Kona” format – with pro and a/g athletes walking through what took place each day. At first, I thought it was a joke and I was being pranked. Why me? Honestly, I am still not sure why - there were athletes, in my opinion, with far more interesting paths to Kona… athletes with more curb appeal… athletes with more inspiring stories… I was simply crazy enough to stay in the game longer than some!
Fast forward > 08 October – Arrival at the Kona Airport, I was greeted with humidity that was off-the-charts and an e-mail on the Blackberry, letting me know that the NBC crew was waiting for me at baggage pick-up. TSA would not let them on the tarmac.
For the next 6 days, I would spend 2-4 hours each day, with a great group of professional cameramen who loved what they were doing. We were filmed picking up the rental car… shopping for groceries… cooking dinner… registering for the race… swimming… cycling… running… the Legacy Athlete reception… EN Breakfast… and more! We received VIP treatments, including a special media access pass for Sue, so she could be on the pier during the swim start and at the finish line when I crossed.
At the end of each day, the film crew and I would meet back at the condo and go into the bathroom, turning out all of the lights and removing the picture from the wall. An insanely bright diffuser-style lens was placed about 6 feet from my face – and I was interviewed for 30-45 minutes each evening, counting down the number of days until Saturday and explaining what I did during the day… where we went… how I felt… It was hilarious knowing I was being filmed in a bathroom!
Fast forward > 13 October - the NBC crew showed up at the condo at 3:45 a.m. ready to go! I was provided with a micro-transmitter, approximately the size of a Halloween fun-size Snickers bar, to carry in my jersey pocket, during the ride and the run. NBC and Sue were able to track my exact location - including current speed, pace, and mile marker - every minute of the day via MapMyAthlete.com (a VERY cool program!!)
We met, as a team, at 6:15 a.m., near the Power Bar Bottle, for a quick team photo. The Star Spangled Banner played and it brought tears to my eyes. I felt my dad’s presence in the air – and that was quite calming. I had come to terms with not having a PR or racing out of my mind. I was determined to enjoy every second of the day.
The cannon initially misfired. Mike Riley ended yelled “GO! GO! GO!” – followed several seconds later by a delayed blast, indicating the day was underway.
I let the scrum of swimmers go and simply tried to latch on to the back of the pack. The swim seemed to take forever - the swells were getting larger and I swear I saw a sign under water that said MAUI > 5 miles. Nonetheless, it was beautiful!
Eventually out of the water – and with a swim split of 1:30-something, it was not difficult to find my bike. I swam relaxed and had a blast, smiling – and yes, even a bit of giggling – thinking this might be my only invite to the Big Dance! I can say, with a fair amount of certainty that no one had as much fun in the water as I did!
Out on the bike, I focused on keeping within zones, while enjoying all that was going on. The trusty Garmin 500 was set to go off every 10 minutes, reminding me to focus on nutrition and hydration. The winds were freakin’ brutal! I found it fascinating that the male pros were coming back into Kona as I was passing the 40-mile mark – outbound! At Hawi, we were slammed with a monsoon that felt like I was being sand blasted. At one point, I closed my eyes and put my head down to avoid the stinging on my face for a moment. The straw from my aero-bottle hit the right lens from my sunglasses and I heard the ‘tink… tink… tink…’ of the lens bouncing across the pavement. I looked up and laughed my bum off, trying to imagine how silly this must have looked – one lens in and one lens missing.
20 minutes later, the rain stopped as quickly as it began and the sun was, once again, cooking us like rotisserie chickens! I came upon a cyclist who had, shall we say over-exerted himself in the early portion of the bike. I asked how he was doing; he was fuming, telling me how much this sucked… he couldn’t wait to be done… he felt like crap… blah – blah – blah! I was not going to be sucked into his negative quagmire! Once he was done bitchin’, he asked how I was and I told him that a crappy day racing in Kona was better than a great day doing yard work in Boston – and that’s likely what I would have been doing if I were not in Kona. He was even more steamed when he learned that he was getting passed by a Legacy Athlete - all but taking the final gusts out of his sails J I can say, with a fair amount of certainty that no one had as much fun on the bike, as I did!
The run was simply spectacular! In the past, I would have started the run miserably, trying to gut-out the dehydration shuffle. In Kona, the crowds were amazing, lining the first 5 mile out & back section. Once on the Queen K, heading towards the Natural Energy Lab, the sunset was one of the most spectacular shows ever, followed by an astronomer’s dream when darkness overtook the course. The crowds and athletes were steadily thinning out and I found myself with more alone time than in any previous race. This provided plenty of time to focus and reflect on all that transpired as part of the journey to Kona.
The last mile of the run was surreal. Coming down Palani Road, I was flooded with emotion. My dad was close by… the crowds were getting larger and louder… a dream was coming true… Kim Ashworth found me (thank you SO much Kim!!) – and started running alongside of me, on the sidewalk, whipping the crowd into a frenzy! I made the final right hand turn, on to Ali’i Drive. Having watched every Ironman telecast, I felt prepared for the last 800 meters. Oddly enough, having intentionally dialed it back all day long, so I could savor this time, I found myself being sucked into a vortex of energy and excitement never felt before. The lights were blinding… the crowds deafening… my body was tingling – it was a complete and total sensory overload! And despite wanting to capture this moment for a few minutes, I found I couldn’t slow down! The tears were welling up inside and I couldn’t wait to see Sue on the other side of the finish line. I can say, with a fair amount of certainty that no one had as much fun on the run as I did!
Mike Riley’s voice was never sweeter. It was all I had hoped it would be and SO much more! 29 years of multi-sport racing… 22 applications for the Kona Lottery… and now 27 Ironman finishes. It was a little bit of heaven!
Race reports often end with giving thanks to all who were part of the journey. In no particular order, and at the risk of leaving people out…
- Patrick and Rich – Thank you for playing such a significant role in fulfilling a dream. You provided guidance, balance and structure – and you believe in all of us. I tip my EN visor to both of you.
- Dottie – You have been a true friend and I love you sweetie!! Thank you so much for your support -
- Larry – You are the brother I didn’t have. I appreciate all that you have brought into our lives. Thank you for sharing this adventure with your parents and Larissa. Willie and Anna should have been with us – I am sure Kathleen was.
- EN Team members – You folks are simply rock stars! To those who were in Kona – you were a great source of support and information and I appreciate you talking me down each time I started to spin out of control! Thank you!!
To those who supported this adventure from across the pond - you were in Kona in spirit and I thought of the Dashboard several times during the day! At some point, regardless of how it happens (Lottery… Qualify… Legacy…) go to Kona and do the Big Dance. I have not experienced anything like it in the tri world.
- Keegan – The best daughter ever! I love you and am so very, very proud of you.
- The Kennedy family – Thank you for believing in us and offering a second chance. I am blessed and I promise to never take this for granted.
- The McCavanaugh family – Amazing job, John! You and Emily, as well as the kids were great fun!
- The Freese family – Thanks for your support. I think Dad would have been proud. And always remember – “If you have to ask why – you will never understand!”
- The WTC – Wow! Thank you! ‘nuff said!
- Sue – You knew what it was to have an unfulfilled dream. You supported that dream. Most importantly - you never gave up on us. Thank you. I love you more than you will ever know.
ADDENDUM > NBC COVERAGE
Adding to an already amazing experience - this was the proverbial icing on the cake!
Traditionally, NBC has had 5-6 weeks to edit and produce the Ironman broadcast. Various websites have speculations and conspiracy theories as to why the date was changed. I asked a few of the NBC muckety-mucks and was given the same answer – in so many words, they were tweaking the format and trying to get the show to broadcast sooner.
I now have a much greater appreciation for what is involved in the world of television. The logistics of bringing this show to the big screen were simply amazing.
Each day, a crew spent between 2-4 hours filming > everything from picking up the rental car and grocery shopping to practice swims and going thru race registration. It’s difficult to be inconspicuous when you have 3-4 people walking around you with a camera and a microphone, telling you to “be yourself.”
Every day things like bike drop off were a much bigger production as it now involved moving several people. That said, it opened doors to things I otherwise would not have had access to. The Legacy Athlete Reception, for example, was SO special! With NBC’s presence, it took on another dimension! To have Julie Moss, Paula Newby-Fraser, Heather Fuhr, and Greg Welch asking you questions… To have Andrew Messick, the CEO of the WTC, come up to you and shake your hands, thanking you for all you have done for the sport – it was an out-of-body experience!
The facial expressions of people around us were often hilarious! People would look and point – in some cases, taking photos. Others would look and ponder… some would simply ask “Who are you?” as it was clearly evident I was NOT a pro J
The day after, the camera crew brought us to the TYR House – a spectacular mansion, in the foothills of Kona. Here, we had brunch w/ Leanda Cave, Andy Potts and Craig Alexander – to name a few of the pros. This was SO cool – and we got to build our own goggles J
And in the end, I had no idea what might be broadcast and what might end up on the floor of the editing room.
Family and friends gathered to watch the show on Saturday, 27 October – with a wide range of knowledge and understanding of the triathlon world. When the pros were on and race footage was being shown, everyone sat quietly, glued to the television. My mug would pop up and I would get peppered with questions like “Where were you when this was filmed?” and “What day was this?” among other things. Work has been crazy, as have family obligations and I have yet to see the coverage uninterrupted > hoping to do so this weekend.
As a result of NBC, I was blessed with the opportunity to spend time w/ other Kona athletes who were included in the broadcast. In my opinion, others should have been featured more…
Karen Aydelott > 66-year-old a/g athlete, who lost her leg as a result of a training ride accident when struck by a car. Four years after Karen’s leg had to be amputated, she tried to qualify for Kona - a race she had finished 12 times prior to the accident. Karen gave the Physically Challenged Division a shot a handful of times before she indicated it was becoming “more and more difficult” to qualify among the growing number of athletes w/ special needs. Karen ended up going to IM Arizona last year, where, as I understand it, she won her age group out right.
Brad Murray > representing R.O.D.S (Racing for Orphans with Downs Syndrome) had a fascinating adventure to share and brought tears to my eyes!
Annee Deering > the Kona Inspired athlete who was a survivor of sexual abuse as a child!
Beth Ann Telford > survivor of brain tumors!
Bonner Paddock > the first athlete with Cerebral Palsy to complete the race – while raising $1 million dollars as part of his journey!
Mollie Serano > beat pancreatic cancer!
One woman had 57 Ironman finishes – and this was her first time lining up at the Pier!
These people had stories to tell. These people had adventure to share. These folks had newsworthy things that, in my opinion, were much more media-friendly.
And as I watched the show, I felt insignificant, knowing that others in the field, who had overcome far greater obstacles in crossing the finish line of the Big Dance. I was simply stupid enough to apply for the Lottery 22 years in a row – and no comparison to cancer or special needs.
In 1968, world-renowned artist Andy Warhol said "In the future, everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes." As I reflect on all that has happened I am going with the position that Kona 2012 was my 15 minutes – and it was a blast!
In the beginning of this report, I shared a statement I have on my desk – if the mind is right… the body will follow.
Leading up to and including 13 October – the mind was finally right and the body followed. When comparing 14 hours, 10 minutes and 56 seconds to those who finished before me and to my previous finishes, yes, the body may have followed slowly. Emotionally and spiritually – I kicked ass and took names.
Comments
Congrats. What a great overall experience. Good luck to you and the rest of us as we deal with siimilar issues.
Thank you Woody. I greatly enjoyed your report and more importantly, sharing your overall story and the perspective that you bring with it.
Watching you on TV was a blast, and coming from another for whom Kona seems like a distant dream, I'm so glad that you were able to finally fulfill yours.
That was a great report Woody! So glad you where able to throughly enjoy the day and take everythiing in. Sometimes we forget to do that and get caught up in the numbers. Congratulations on your race. It was a pleasure to meet you . Good luck in your future endeavors!
27 Finishes is truly hard to even understand. I've done 2 now (or I should say, My wife, mom, and sis and I have done two now, with them as a spectators) and I have even more respect Now for the Ironman Vets like yourself compared to finishing my first. There are so many positive aspects of this sport, but the life balance is one of the negative sides IMO. EN certainly gives us a strong fighting chance to keep that balance for as long as possible.
Hats off to you and your family...
Woody - sometimes the universe lines up to give you an unanticipated gift. Thanks for unwrapping it in front of us.