Crashed my bike 1 week before IMMT - Picking up the pieces, now what do I do??
This Summer didn’t turn out quite as I planned. Months of
hard work and training leading up to my ‘A’ race, IMMT, ended with a bad bike
crash exactly 8 days bike before the race. That was this past Saturday. I had Coach P’s words “don’t do anything
stupid the week before your race” playing over in my head. Not sure that I did
anything stupid, but the timing was uncanny. My wife Heidi, who is also racing,
decided to stay back for the last 2.5 hour bike and ride the trainer….woman’s
intuition?
My crash happened near my weekend lake cottage in the
Berkshires, MA, on a straightaway, on a very lightly traveled country road. I’ve
done lots of my IM build on these roads. No cars, bikes, pedestrians, moose
involved, that I know of. This one was on me, although I’m still unsure what
happened. I was in aero moving along – garmin later showed me at 28mph – and I
recall my bars pulling all the way to the right, and I knew instantly I was
going down very badly. I’m not sure what happened, but I was then on my back in
the road in tons of pain. I couldn’t sit up and my fingertips were searing. The
sun was in my eyes blinding me as I try to take stock of things. I found myself
screaming, and sat in the road for 3-4 minutes before a motorist came by,
stopped, called 911 and tried to calm me down. I couldn’t be more indebted to
the man who stopped. He was calm, asked the right questions, did the right
thing and stayed with me throughout. I knew I had either broken my clavicle,
shoulder or both on my right side, and also had lots of pain halfway down my
back. As others stopped by, worries
turned to whether or not I had a neck injury. The smart group decided not move
me or remove my helmet. We waited 25 endless minutes for the ambulance to get
there, which seemed like eternity. They were unable to get Heidi on the phone and
I later found out that she was on her brick run, when they hunted her down.
After finally getting to the hospital on a long and bumpy
ride, Heidi was waiting there with our neighbor who is an ER doc when they
unloaded me from the ambulance. They brought me in for a CT scan to rule out
neck injuries, and when all was done, they diagnosed me with a broken right
clavicle, broken 5th rib on my back, and a bunch of road rash. The worst
of the road rash is on 6 fingers, where my fingertips were somehow ground down to
the nub. I surmise that maybe I never let go of the aerobars on contact, but
I’m not sure. I was released hours later from the hospital, but not before
passing out when they finally sat me up
for the first time. Perhaps it was the ungodly amounts of morphine they had
injected me with throughout the day!
A couple of days later, I got to my orthopedist – a great
shoulder and knee doc. One look at the x-rays, told him that surgery is my best
bet due to the nature of the break and my level activity. For someone who’s
never had surgery, the word scares me. But, this seems like the best option.
So where am I now? I’ve convinced Heidi that she should race
IMMT, and I’d like to be there to cheer
her on with my kids in doing so. The doc says putting off surgery until next
week is ok, and traveling to MT is ok, although I might be in discomfort.
Surgery is scary for me, put it looks like this is the path I’ll take. Tim
Cronk has shared a bit of his experience with the surgery with me, but I would
like to hear other’s as well. And, what do I do next? I had planned to run a
stand-alone marathon this Fall in an attempt to BQ. That was before my crash.
I’m now considering a trip to IM Cozumel in late November. I believe registration
is still open. The idea of wasting the “IM fitness” eats at me some. This was
to be my 2nd IM. Thoughts from the team?
Finally, I realize this could’ve been far worse. For all
that happened, I cannot find a scratch on my helmet. I don’t know how that’s
possible, but it doesn’t appear I hit my head. My bike needs a good look over by
my LBS. I have some cracked components (bar end shifters, brakes, etc), but
there is one suspect spot right in the middle of the cross tube that may be a
crack. I haven’t had the heart to really inspect it better. Does homeowner’s insurance
cover bike damage in case it is totaled? I still cannot believe that this has
happened. I wish I knew the cause…that bothers me. I’ve had a nightmare each
night since about my crash, maybe somewhat drug induced, but its clearly on my
mind. For us who tend to try to control and measure everything in our lives as
best we can (I’m guessing most of us type-A triathletes), losing control on the
bike freaked me out. I spoke with teammate Scott Dinhofer last night who
suggested that maybe I got hit from behind – hit and run. The thought hadn’t crossed
my mind. This is entirely possible and eats at me even more. I guess none of
that matters now. Time to put the pieces back together and KMF.
I’m writing this at the suggestion of several teammates in
an attempt for advice, suggestions and maybe some self therapy. I am not
looking for pity, but would like to hear from anyone who would like to comment
whether you’ve been in these shoes or not. All advice and comments are very
welcomed.
Thanks for all the well wishes and for reading this long
post!
Comments
Brad, I've been there. Believe me, I've been there, lying in the road, wondering what happened, getting transported to the trauma unit of the Army hospital near the deserted Fort Lewis road I'd been cruising down @ 25+ mph. I was probably in the best shape of my life, coming off of three supremely successful IMs in the past 15 months, with two more upcoming in 3 and 8 weeks. I won't go into the details of my injuries (if you're curious, you can read this and the following posts), but there was not a moment after the accident that I wasn't plotting on how I would get back in the saddle and return to my previous form. So I get that feeling. The doctors and other staff in the Army hospital where I landed were all young and eager, and used to dealing with "wounded warriors" who all wanted to get back to their buddies right away, so they encouraged that sort of optimism. But on reflection, I wish somebody had taken a moment to simply shake me by the shoulders and say, "Look, you've just suffered a devastating, life-threatening set of injuries. It's gonna be messing with your head and your body for the foreseeable future. You really need to focus on simply healing, and let your return to training and competition come in baby steps, not all at once. You'll get there, you just need to be patient."
Long (very long) story short, I was "on the couch" for four months, another five months training for IM CDA, where I had the worst race of my life up to that point, and another five months training for IM AZ, where I had the BEST race of my life. My point: maybe IM Cozumel as an immediate goal is not necessary for you to achieve your triathlon goals. Maybe the best way forward is simply to do what you can THIS day, and let the improvements come in their own time. No need to rush things, Ironman is not going away anytime soon. Your "IM fitness" will be gone in 2-3 weeks; you won't get it back for at least 4-6 months after you re-start training following recovery from surgery. Be patient!
One other post I'd suggest reading, this one a year and a half after my accident, summarizing my return to form (and I still had another 9 months to go at that point, though I didn't realise it at the time.)
My homeowner's insurance (or maybe my car insurance?) paid for my bike repairs, minus the deductible. The funny thing: The truck I ran into suffered $927 in damage, for which the US Govt billed me. My insurance covered that from dollar Zero!
Peter's http://members.endurancenation.us/Forums/tabid/57/aft/18379/Default.aspx
Tim's http://members.endurancenation.us/Forums/tabid/57/aft/12637/Default.aspx
Scott's http://members.endurancenation.us/Forums/tabid/57/aft/9017/Default.aspx
I'm sorry to hear about your crash, but at 28MPH you are very lucky because it could have been much worse and to not have a nick on your helmet is amazing. Interesting theory about being hit from behind, but certainly possible.
In december of 2012 i went down on my bike and broke my hip. I didn't need surgery, but was unable to walk for about 7 weeks. After those 7 weeks I started training and was able to get myself reasonably back in shape and completed IMCDA in June of 2013 as my first IM. The remainder of my 2013 season was plagued by injuries. Looking back what i realize now is that even though your injuries may heal and you may feel fine, it takes time for your body to regain strength in all those secondary muscle groups that have been dormant during the healing process. I strongly believe this is what caused so many of my injuries in 2013. All that being said, i think cozumel is very aggressive. With an injury such as the one you sustained i think it is very difficult to plan around. The coach have a saying here and i think it makes sense and that's, "your injury is now your coach". It's true in that you need to let that determine what you can do and how quickly you come back - your injury dictates everything. For now sounds like you are fine deferring surgery until after IMMT so go and support your wife. After surgery focus on recovering, (plenty of sleep, high quality diet, etc.) and focus on body comp. Those are things completely within your control and then follow Dr.'s orders in terms of adding in exercise/training.
The one other consideration is don't underestimate the mental impact of coming back from a crash. When i broke my hip that was my first major bike crash and it took me a good year to get my nerve back 100%. There were many rides where i started to get very nervous on fast descents or when cornering.
Hang in there, Brad! You'll get through this and be good as new and there will be plenty more opportunities to race IM in your future!
Brad,
Trying to get my head wrapped around what you must be going through right now. Very difficult challenge to say the least.
I have been through a few things in my time and (sparing you the many details) I have learned that, during these times, moving forward means finding strength in supporting others. That may be confusing at a time when you obviously need the team to huddle and support you. But, supporting your wife in her race and losing yourself doing so while picking up the pieces is something that you will find great strength and peace in vs. letting this thing drive you crazy while it occupies your time.
Just my two cents......
IMCoz is a great race and venue for the family. If this is something that helps you focus and gives you a goal to fight for, I say you should consider it. I know, for me, I need something on the calendar to get me focused and motivated, a plan if you will. That said, be smart about what is realistic given your current situation and take some time to make that decision.
Reaching out to the veterans, sharing like situations is just plain smart..........
Great example of moving forward here, if you ask me.
SS
Glad to see you are able to type! Per the comments above, I held back when you first brought up Cozumel yesterday, as I know from my own experience that we all want to put it back to work ASAP, but I knew the right answer, which is, it isn't gonna happen. Even if you could miraculously finish that swim and then get on a bike, etc, you won't have enough time ahead of it to truly prepare and have the race you want to have.
I am going through the same issue with my back situation & the nerve damage in my leg. I have Chattanooga in 7 weeks. I am hopeful, but pretty confident that race is in the toilet I will know for sure in the next two weeks. If i can't start to seriously train a few weeks starting 5-6 weeks out, the race is shot.
I have the NY Marathon in November, also going to try to BQ and I pretty much "think" I can do that, but it won't be a BQ this year, so I am looking into deferring that race.
Now I am toying with signing up for IMAZ(found a super not so secret deal to get in) I probably can complete it, but will it be a completion I will be happy with?We all feel the urge to continue forward, to resume normalcy as soon as possible, partially to know we "are OK." You are now getting an additional aspect of EN, people who have been through exactly what you are going through. I first met Al a few weeks? after he was released from the hospital. I became friends with him while watching him rebuild an ace machine. I have seen Tim, Coach P, Scott A & others get back to form. Kori Martini got slammed by a car and is rebuilding as we write this.
You will rebuild. step 1, fix the problems and heal properly (words I need to listen 2), step 2, do the PT & continue to heal properly, step 3, get back into the game and make yourself better than before
let's do this and try not to put on 20lbs in the recovery process!
heal fast!
- Make sure you are eating a lot of fiber. Narcotics will back you up. Try to get off them as soon as you can and just be on Tylenol. The narcotics could be contributing to your dreams as well.
- I tried to eat as much calcium as possible. (Targetted 1500mg per day from natural food sources, brocolli, dairy, small fish)
- Daredevil on Netflix is great!
- You might be able to get back on the trainer sooner than you think. My doc encouraged this. I wouldn't worry about watts or training for a race, its just nice to do something active. Prop the front tire up to take the weight off of your arms.
- If you have a recliner, that is your new best friend, otherwise you need to build a pillow tower to prop yourself up.
- Focus on nutrition, this one was the hardest for me, I gained 6 pounds while on injured reserve. Losing the weight later sucks.
- Once you start training again, reset all of your PRs wherever you can. I reset mine in Trainer Road, on my watch, and in Garmin Connect. Its nice having some mojo to set new PRs as you recover.
A lot of great advice from your teammates. If you think it is possible you were hit from behind, have your LBS people closely examine the back tire, rim, spokes, etc to see if there is some evidence of an impact. Do this before the tire is removed, because an abrasion on the tire may line up with a bend or crack elsewhere. If there is evidence, you may want to consider making an uninsured motorist (UIM) claim against your own auto policy. You probably have that coverage unless you specifically denied it in writing. That coverage can pay for medical bills, lost wages, pain and suffering, maybe even your entry fee at IMMT, but probably not for the property damage to your bike. That coverage would be elsewhere. Get well soon, and best of luck to your wife.
I think one of the reasons why IM athletes almost celebrate the completion of the final race rehearsal is because completing an IM training plan is such an accomplishment all by itself. So, you are not wasting fitness (trying to be positive), you just aren't getting to race. No one can take away what you prepared to do and the discipline it took to get where you were before your accident.
I would recommend slowing things down a bit, which is easier said than done. I wouldn't sign up for anything with a surgery between you and the race. Get the surgery, give it a few weeks, and then reassess. I would lean towards not rushing to sign up for anything too soon. You need to heal first. There are future seasons with future races. You could always try and get into an early race for 2016 (IMTX??)
How's your wife doing? She probably went through a trauma by you getting in an accident. Easy for us to get self focused when we are injured. Make sure you check in with how she's handling YOUR injury.
So sorry to hear about your crash! You were primed to crush MT, no doubt, but it is what it is. In the end, this is all just a game and you need to (1) support your wife in her race (ie, wrangling kids at an IM with a broken rib and clavicle = not fun) (2) get healed.
Carrying on with your triathlon hobby is a distant 3rd to all of that. Many here have broken a clavicle, had surgery, so they can offer advice and set expectations on that. I imagine, however, that you're finding the rib the greater injury, at least in the short term, as you literally can't do anything about it and you'll feel it with every move you make. Do. Not. Sneeze!
Again...this is all just a game. Take it a day at a time and recover like it's your job.
Brad...some great words of wisdom from the team. Focus on healing with the same discipline as you had in the training, and right now that means resting. Your body will heal, and your fitness will come back when you body is ready for it. It will remember.
I've had some bad crashes, never broken a collar bone, but busted some ribs. Don't laugh, don't sneeze, and don't try to swim too soon. i couldn't do a catch and pull without my ribs hurting for 3 months post crash.
I'm glad you are still coming to Mt Tremblant. It will be bittersweet for you, but the EN team will be glad to see you and cheer on Heidi. See you in few days.
BTW - when you are recovered and have the time, it might be useful to go back to where you fell and walk the road for a 1/4 mile around it and see if there was something that might have turned the front wheel fast. That might be good for the mind especially if you find a possible cause. But expect not to find anything...it could have been something as simple as a bad oil slick that took your front wheel right out while your weight was forward.
Also agree with @Nate--how is your wife doing? She has also been through a "significant emotional event". I have two friends that are married. She does 70.3 and he 140.6. While playing soccer with their kids, he blew out his ACL. No IM for him. Not only did he become depressed but her training suffered. She later admitted to feeling guilty going out for a ride/run when he couldn't. Talk with your wife about how you feel. Ask her about how she is feeling.
Some ortho docs don't wrap the chest with an ACE wrap after broken ribs and some do. I have found that it can help when you need to sneeze, cough, laugh, etc. See if that works for you.
Get well soon!
For better or worse, bike crashes are part and parcel of the sport. The game is dealing with adversity of ALL sorts and keep moving forward. This crash is another example of that. For Rapp, it was a crash, for Armstrong it was cancer. EVERY pro and most high volume Ager's have had crashes. Things happen and the sport is about overcoming those things as much as anything else.
In December 2012, I went down hard on a club ride. Broken Clavicle about 12 weeks out from IM Cal 70.3
It was the capper on a truly bad 2012 season. You can read the details here: http://dinosarti.com/blog/2013/1/7/my-2013-season-began-with-a-bang
After my wreck, I went through a lot of what you are dealing with and will be going through. It sucked, but it's the kind of adversity that makes you stronger when you come out the other side.
I remember the first week standing in the shower weeping (I highly recommend the shower if you feel like a good cry) because I was literally broken. I felt like a bird with a broken wing. I didn't go the surgery route and for a couple weeks I could feel the broken edges ruling when I moved until the they finally got "sticky" and stopped moving. I think the drugs and the lack of exercise endorphins plus the constant pain had me severely depressed. I remember it vividly. It was then that resolved to battle back.
The end of the first week, I set up my trainer with the front wheel block on a stack of books. This elevated the front wheel and took all the weight off my arms (like Peter suggested above). I just wore bibs and sat easy spinning in a real high gear wearing my figure 8 sling. I rode every day for about 60-90 minutes. The second week, I started to lift the pace, the third week I was trying 60 minute TT tests, the forth week I was doing intervals and by the 5th week I was outside. It was 8 weeks before running. It's just more jarring.
Those rides kept me from falling into a depression. I am sure of it. I always, always felt better getting off the trainer than I had getting on it. They also helped my keep my weight in check and sweating did wonders for my outlook.
I suggest you focus on a really fun 2016 and just use the rest of this year to reboot.
Gotta agree with the message above, IMCoz is very soon. You have done a lot of great work this year and then some. Take your time with surgery and recovery from all of this. There is no hurry at all to get back into anything serious (that BQ attempt included). That patience in the short term will pay huge dividends in the long run.
I hope that you and your family have a great trip to IMMT this weekend, and that Heidi has a great race.
Good luck with the surgery and keep us posted on your progress.
John.
- This is a huge bummer. Really huge. I feel really sorry for you. What a disappointment.
- You will come back -- lots of examples above to show how that's the case
- Give it time -- forget about Coz or anything this year
vent whenever you need to.
That being said, these last few days have been very hard on me (us). aside from more pain than id anticipated, Ive really had to lean on my wife to do everything that we take for granted day to day. Along with IM on her mind, I know its been tough. As uncomfortable that I will be this weekend, I intend to see through my promise to be there for her MT. I dread the car ride the most!
I never thought I would get the response from the majority of you that I received regarding the rest of my season. I figured IM Coz wouldn't be an issue. I suppose I need to rethink this now, which I will do after my surgery, which is next Thursday. Thank you all for my dose of reality. I am now beginning to deal with the harder part, which is the emotional factor. Not training, racing, preparing, is leaving me with a very empty feeling. I realize its early, but I do not like the feeling, and even now I am finding it hard to sit around. I know this is all "normal", but I will need to find an outlet. For now, thatll be getting myself to MT, and then the surgery, and I will take it from there.
Thank you again for the responses. I cannot put into words how it is helping me move forward.
-Brad
You have a new plan now Brad.
Protect your mind, keep yourself busy, get creative, find ways to influence others positively while you wait for your body to heal enough to train again, lose yourself in that and you will fare much better through this difficult emotional time.....
Keep venting here.....and KMF!
SS
As your teammates have intimated, your injuries are worse than you imagine. And the impact, as you are discovering goes well beyond just your health. We only speak in terms of our experience and what you can expect, but your experience will be your own and we stand by you with your decisions.
#1 - I have always come back stronger. I have just about done it all to myself, from hip to clavicle to forearm, etc., and despite my misery and self-loathing, I have comeback stronger. Your hard work this year doesn't go away...the only thing you have lost is the ability to validate it. Your 2016, 2017 and beyond all look really, really good right now. If you are one to reminisce, here's a great video of me walking for the first time post my bike crash, ignore the salesy stuff there.
#2 -- You are the healthiest patient that your OR will see all year. Your body is primed to heal and reboot, and your work ethic translates quickly to rehab and recovery. You have to switch gears to focus on that vs actual hard core training, but it can be done...rough estimate is 8 weeks post surgery you start PT and 4 weeks after that, you are in a place to start doing stuff with your arm. 12 Weeks. Barely an IM build up. You could be cleared to swim / run come January, just in time for 2016.#3 - The most important thing you can do is to remain calm and in control. The biggest blow here is to the precious lifestyle you have built, the wake ups, the kids, the job, the wife...now it's all haywire...but you can stay in control, you just need to be deliberate and plan well. Here is another post with my reflection on it.
So first things first, get off your plate all the things you can. Lock in a surgery date. Bike to bike shop. Drugs for trip to CA. Be the best damn one-armed sherpa in history. Celebrate Heidi 10000000% because she deserves it. Come up with a great story about saving a bus load of orphans from Al Qaeda or something cool. We can all plan it out from there.
Oh, and in addition to downloading lots of movies and ebooks, you should get this pillow system, it's the bomb for getting comfortable when you try to sleep sitting up.
@Patrick, where was that pillow system when i had Rotator cuff surgery!
@everyone else - anyone have experience with water running? reading this thread & Patrick's blog linked above made me realize what I CAN do to still possibly get to choo this year
dumb idea, a wiki section on injuries, training through them (what you can do...) Seeing you on the drainer on dan & kim's driveway at LP in 2013 is a memory ingrained on me... but there is a lot of collective knowledge of people who have lived through it in the haus!Surgery went "well". It was more extensive than originally planned due to a messier break than the doc had thought. Required a plate with 12 screws (I counted 8 in the X-ray, but doc corrected me on this). Stitches came out yesterday and they feel as though it is healing well. I still have lots of discomfort. Sleeping has been a big challenge. I took Coach P's rec and bought a pillow system hoping it would help, but I can't seem to get an angle that works for me. Arm or hand goes numb and back hurts at night. I'm finding I dread nighttime and just count the hours until I can get up at a reasonable time (after 5am).
I'm learning to do things with left hand. Cleared to drive a bit (feel like a 16 yo who just got a license!). Very frustrated that I can't do more. I especially dislike telling my kids that I can't play ball, swim, etc. I was also cleared to get on the trainer. It felt good to do this, but a bit uncomfortable sitting upright and left arm gets tired when I hold the bars with the one arm. I'll continue to do this to hold onto my sanity and slow the demise of my fitness. Walking is also ok, but how I miss running! Maybe it's the endorphine release I miss, but I'd do anything to go out there and a run a few miles! No Aqua jogging yet. The doc wants me to wait a couple more weeks before I jostle the arm/clavicle around too much. He's given me a couple of simple exercises to do at home to get my arm moving some. The tendons feel atrophied and I'd love more mobility, but they highly encouraged me not to push it as this time is crucial to healing.
I dropped my bike at the shop yesterday for an evaluation. Will most likely get a frame replacement. It felt good to get it out of my garage. I was tired of looking at it everyday.
As most of you had suggested, I scaled back my expectations for the coming months. I don't expect to sign up for anything in the near future - not even a Fall running race. I know that I wouldn't be happy with the training, even if I could squeeze one in, and I wouldn't be happy with my performance. I highly considering IMMT for 2016, but haven't pulled the trigger yet.
Any recovery ideas, advice that I'm missing always appreciated. This is a good forum for me to document progress and just vent a bit. Hopefully someone could use this in the future if they are in need..... Thanks.