"Atilla the Hun" by Marianne
for the guyz: 
FACTS FIRST!
Mt. bike race, 9.8 miles, 2nd for me (1:34) with 2 wrecks and 1st for Heather (1:25) with 1 wreck! also included my husband and most of Arkansas mt biking as it was the last in the championship series. We got on a team that won state champ for the year! I got 2nd place (just found out) and nope didn't ask how many over 40 beginner women there were.....
the rest of the story
Saturday, the day before, was my son Andrew's 18th bday and we all went out to eat at a Brazilian restaurant where they keep bringing you food.... so I ate and ate and ate.. pineapple, chicken, beans, turnip greens, potatoes, pork, roast, sausages, on and on and on, very good but race morning?? ugh... my stomach felt full!!! oh well, birthday's don't happen that frequently and you know I was "fueled up"
We had just come from the AR vs. Ole Miss game.
okay, let me start this shebang off, with me asking DH to get directions to race site!! and he gets mapquest from the race site website and we follow it to the letter and we literally deadend at somebody's house!
it was 1 hour before race start and with Heather behind us... I actually get outta my car and grab my camera as I am laughing so hard that I can't even stand up...
I joke that Attila the Hun lives here and we have found her house! I am giggling and snickering and really can't even think straight.. he says in a deadpan (married for 25 years) "Marianne, this isn't funny and I need you to be part of the solution." which then made me hold my breath and not let out the laughs that were deep within......
and he calls our friend and yes I am still giggling and by then so is he and so is Heather as we texted back and forth to get the correct directions!!!
We arrive to the race site which looked so much better than the above scene!!
and there we meet her.
Heather and Joe are still smiling at registration.
and the three of gals represent the Beginner women for our team, Bell & Co. and we have all done Ironman Kentucky and numerous triathlons and running races, but as Susan points out "we had trained for that!".. we are newbies, green, noobs, beginners, and way out of our league in the mt biking scene, and in fact as we were walking to registration a guy that we know says "are you racing?" incredulously!! and I quipped back "yeah, don't we look like we are!" we are about to start and were the last wave, making for more nervousness.
The race:
okay so sure I take advice and seed myself and get in the front as the beginning is on a road and I tell Heather "hey we know how to ride fast on a road!" and off we go but then making a sharp left turn into gravel and you guessed it, I skidded! how embarrassing but hopped back on... and seeing other females pass me by..... aargh! so I continue to race ahead and I make it over this creek thing, not sure how and I guess I couldn't believe it either, cuz I veer right and crash right into this group of trees and underbrush!!! skinning up my pinky and bruising my right thigh and all of this is within the first 10'!!! My heart rate is sky high an I am breathing hard and I have miles to go!!!
okay so I gotta concentrate and not go as fast!! now mt biking peeps had described this course as "Pleasant and one of their favorites", and I am gonna say it was hard and technical with S turns and switchbacks, and some logs and going down the trail into "rabbit holes" I swear that is what they looked like! downhill over pine needles covering up wiry roots and sticky out things!! I had only ridden 10 miles one other time so by mile 7, you coulda called it the race!!! at one point, one of the fast doodes lapped me and said this which made me laugh actually "This is the fast part!" and then he said "enjoy the downhill", oh dear, this is the downhill that they all talked about.... pine needles, straight down, curvy, Switchback and I scooted back on my seat remembering what everybody told me and somehow I got down it!! Sweat was beaded up the back of me and all down my face, I drank from my camel like I was out in the desert although it was just high 60's here and sunny! and then it happened...
I hear some hoopin' and hollerin' and the fast guys were approaching!! goodness gracious if that didn't beat all.... I had started before them and they are making three laps and are about to pass me, so I yell back "Pass me when you get here!" and one guy said "passing you on the right!" and of course which way did I go = to the right!!! so he says "okay on the left!" and I said "sorry, sorry, I don't know what I am doing!!" and together we go over this log!
thoughts of "what in the world am I doing out here?" but then other thoughts of "I am really doing this!!" and I finish up and see Joe and Heather waiting on me....
I am beet red in the face and completely whooped!! 1:34 and I was estimating 1:30 for the trip. I learned quite a few things as when I went into ring #1 (easy) I actually went into #3 (hard) and then had to walk up the hill so I need to work on that shifting as I rode the course in #2 so of course was breathless at the crest of the hills as I was clamouring over rocks and the like!! My bike skills are keeping me back too!! lol 
but after miles of switchback I got a bit better!! I am still "in" on this mt biking gig and really want to encourage other females to try it!!
Post race video:
I also enjoyed cheering for the sport and expert! while eating post race food of rice and beans and of course a cold COKE!
***
bonus story:
RUNNING LIKE A DOG:
Facts first: 6 mile run with son #1's dog in 1:13 to include all stops.
The day after, technically is a rest day but home from college is my "grand dog" Rudy.... and the pup is way too hyper without some outside activity... and me being a runner, why this morning I took him on a run.... and as you know I love to run, so twist my arm!! high 50's spitting rain, humidity, nobody on the trail = perfect run!! and I got to run with Rudy! I was excited and so was he, and hopped in my car at 7 a.m. and stayed in the driver's side, patiently waiting on when I took the kids to school.
so how do dogs run anyways? well with no "warm up pacing", nah, who needs that? he sees birds and takes off at an 8:30 clip!! my 1 mile repeats have been 8:07 for reference!! and he is not trained either so is pulling on me with all his might! and I am pulling on him!! hilarious... then he goes into his "squirrel sprint" pace which is a sub 7:18 pace! and then he learned the word "stop!"
yes I was kind and gave him and me a snack of a cheezit!! and took this pic! and then taught him "Let's go!" and off we went again..... stopping for a pitstop and at the water fountain.... well we ran for 6 miles!! and we did "stop" and "let's go" several times and at one point pulled off the trail to avoid a skunk up ahead..good thing cuz I think I was doing "wednesday's" run workout as that has 2 x 1 miles at TP!
okay so we gotta stretch!! and I lay down beside the water and get him too as well! after getting some water at my car! it has taken 6 miles to chill (me) and him!!
and he gladly hops in the back seat! my son is home for Thanksgiving break for this week! so I think I will enjoy running this week.
Comments
m--if that is not THE Best thing I have read on EN in forever, I don't know what is! LOVE IT!!!! Esp. the going right instead of L when getting passed. OMG, I would so have done that.
Thanks for the smiles and inspiration. Your willingness to try new things is so awesome. Congrats girl! You look like you are having a world of fun!
Also, re running with the dog. I'm telling you, go out and get a "prong collar." If he's untrained, this will literally give you power steering over him. It looks like a medieval torture device, but doesn't hurt them at all. I can get you tons of articles on how to use it, and how to fit it. It's just the way the momma dog would correct the pooch to stay near. Makes a pull fest into a nice, pleasant run! I LOVE having Cali to run with. It's the best.
Marianne--that's just AWESOME! I'm so happy that you're having such a fun time with mtb---and you got a trophy! How cool is that?!
Yep, pine needles and dry leaves hide alot of "land mines" on the trails. Makes one thankful for full suspension. When it comes time for you to get a mtb bike, test drive a 29er full-suspension. It will makes those obstacles seem like teeny, tiny bumps.
It's great to have so much fun at a race. Good job on picking things up after two crashes and finishing.
Gordon
Sounds like a lot of fun. Reminds me of that race I did. 9.8 miles is a long way on the mt. bike when it's not your regular thing. Awesome on 2nd! That means you passed people! I found passing scarier than being passed.