Do you mean women who are triathletes, or women who are spouses of triathletes?
I would think that SAUS are about building harmony and balance in a relationship, and apply to both parties whenever self-indulgence is being practiced.
We female athletes definitely have to pay our SAUs. My boyfriend is in law school, I'm training for an Ironman and we both have full-time jobs. I've learned trading self-indulgences works a little bit. I just proofread a paper. This might make Mac a little happier to carry around a bag of spare triathlon stuff and cheer this summer, but good old-fashioned SAUs work way better. Date night. Remembering crazy hobbies don't get you out of doing the dishes. Remembering I don't just want to have a roommate who also has a busy life; I want a relationship. And it works way better when Mac knows he has premier executive status in my life. Boy gets cranky when he gets bumped to coach.
Oh hell yeah I have to build SAU's. Let's see. Honey- I want to spend 1 week of my precious vacation time in California in May riding bikes with my EN buddies. And then I want to spend several days of vacation in Madison to do some training with the EN Chickas. Oh, and then I need YOU to spend vacation time (assuming he's working again by they- please God) coming to Ironman Wisconsin with me where you'll be catering to my every emotional wreck of a whim all weekend. Let's top that off with my poorly vailed attempts to disguise a training opportunity as a "just us" vacation: "how about we spend a week in Boon NC biking and hiking in the mountains this spring?"
So yeah- I'm alway working on that balance that Beth talks about!
Vince- I'd agree, there is kinda an automatic SAU giver that woman can utilize. But IMHO, it's like refined sugar treats. There's an immediate fix and feeling of happiness, but then there's a sugar crash afterwards and in the end, he's still unsatisfied, hungry, wanting more, and my SAU account isn't any more full than it was before hand.
Nemo...sounds like you are rather demanding :-). JK.
I was referring primarily to my past marriage, which was WAY out of balance and SAU points were "few and far between" therefore every point "earned" went a long way on her end :-).
Nemo's totally right -- SAU's have an sugar crash-like expiration date. You can't pay a huge balance of SAUs in January and expect they will still be there in July. Relationships are like running. Regular SAU intervals are the way to go.
And with big things, like Ironman, I think we all have to remember that just because we are tired and needy and cranky doesn't mean our partners aren't all of those things too for putting up with us in those crazy states where we don't see piles of tri gear by the front door and become zombies who go to bed at nine. Because they probably are.
@Al mostly I meant female triathletes when the hubby isn't a triathlete. I'm not complaining just curious. I'm lucky my wife has a horse. Saddle time is good for both of us.
Keith and I will be married for 29 years in June, and were together for 5 years before that. Raised 4 boys, he has a career as a crazy engineer, and I have my own biz. We have trained, and planned, and worked together toward athletic, personal and family goals for a very long time. I do the Ironman, he does not.
Along the way we have figured out that each of us has the season to be the "diva" athlete. When he is training for his bike goals and events, it's his turn to call the shots. I tag along. In the heat of IM training, I'm the diva and he helps me out. All along the way, however, it's one long running total of SAUs with no one keeping score. I'm not sure the whole "banking" idea works. Sure there are some spikes for one person or the other, but give-and-take with a running ebb and flow seems to work best. Balance.
Even is your wife, hubby, or SO isn't an athlete, they can have their own "diva" season in whatever their interests are.
Ladies, I don't think I earn SAUs "that way" unless it is during the final IM 12 weeks of training.
With a non triathlon spouse it is easier for me to earn SAUs by getting my workout done when he is at work or asleep. If he wants to ride with me, I go out and do the intervals- the MS as it were- then come back and we go out together. He prefers to sleep in while I am a very early bird- so this is perfect. His endurance is not close to mine (his job is way more all consuming than mine) but I fully support his efforts to maintain some level of fitness. On weekends during in season, once my workout is done, he basically calls the shots. The rest of the year, everything is a team effort.
WAIT! Now that you mention it, I'm not sure that I EVER earn SAUs??!!!
I'm about to earn some HUGE SAU's in the form of an 8 pound prime rib roast for tomorrow night's dinner. Vince, you're right: my SAU earnings are pretty easy and built into my life. As long as I make dinner and do laundry, I'm free to engage in any triathlon craziness I fancy.
In the winter I earn SAU's by just being around, and not being out on the roads where he then worries about me. John is not a triathlete, all his sports involve the TV.
I ride my trainer in the living room while he plays the Xbox. That way we can talk (inbetween intervals) and still do what we want. My husband is pretty layed back. We are both so busy with grad school and work that time together is precious even if we are doing different things.
I had the same arrangement with my ex-wife. As long as I made the money, cleaned the house, washed/dryed/folded and put away the laundry and watched out 6 kids when she went out with the girls 2-3 nights/wk AND didn't run or ride past noon on the weekends...I would earn SAU's. Again...she's an EX. I just couldn't make it home by noon on some of the century rides .
ABP - you thought it meant always be pushing but really it means Always Be Planning on how to best rack up SAU's so you have a big balance when you need it. Wife doesn't keep count and I am really lucky that she is 100% supportive of my tri-style, but does not mean that I am not constantly looking for little ways to remind her that I appreciate her!
Comments
Do you mean women who are triathletes, or women who are spouses of triathletes?
I would think that SAUS are about building harmony and balance in a relationship, and apply to both parties whenever self-indulgence is being practiced.
We female athletes definitely have to pay our SAUs. My boyfriend is in law school, I'm training for an Ironman and we both have full-time jobs. I've learned trading self-indulgences works a little bit. I just proofread a paper. This might make Mac a little happier to carry around a bag of spare triathlon stuff and cheer this summer, but good old-fashioned SAUs work way better. Date night. Remembering crazy hobbies don't get you out of doing the dishes. Remembering I don't just want to have a roommate who also has a busy life; I want a relationship. And it works way better when Mac knows he has premier executive status in my life. Boy gets cranky when he gets bumped to coach.
Not being sexist...just an observation noted during long training rides with a variety of men and women.
Vince
Oh hell yeah I have to build SAU's. Let's see. Honey- I want to spend 1 week of my precious vacation time in California in May riding bikes with my EN buddies. And then I want to spend several days of vacation in Madison to do some training with the EN Chickas. Oh, and then I need YOU to spend vacation time (assuming he's working again by they- please God) coming to Ironman Wisconsin with me where you'll be catering to my every emotional wreck of a whim all weekend. Let's top that off with my poorly vailed attempts to disguise a training opportunity as a "just us" vacation: "how about we spend a week in Boon NC biking and hiking in the mountains this spring?"
So yeah- I'm alway working on that balance that Beth talks about!
Vince- I'd agree, there is kinda an automatic SAU giver that woman can utilize. But IMHO, it's like refined sugar treats. There's an immediate fix and feeling of happiness, but then there's a sugar crash afterwards and in the end, he's still unsatisfied, hungry, wanting more, and my SAU account isn't any more full than it was before hand.
Nemo...sounds like you are rather demanding :-). JK.
I was referring primarily to my past marriage, which was WAY out of balance and SAU points were "few and far between" therefore every point "earned" went a long way on her end :-).
Vince
Nemo's totally right -- SAU's have an sugar crash-like expiration date. You can't pay a huge balance of SAUs in January and expect they will still be there in July. Relationships are like running. Regular SAU intervals are the way to go.
And with big things, like Ironman, I think we all have to remember that just because we are tired and needy and cranky doesn't mean our partners aren't all of those things too for putting up with us in those crazy states where we don't see piles of tri gear by the front door and become zombies who go to bed at nine. Because they probably are.
@Al mostly I meant female triathletes when the hubby isn't a triathlete. I'm not complaining just curious. I'm lucky my wife has a horse. Saddle time is good for both of us.
As a dual tri-geek house, we like to think of it this way- there's Team Boyle. And then there's Dave and Leigh. Both need to co-exist under one roof.
Keith and I will be married for 29 years in June, and were together for 5 years before that. Raised 4 boys, he has a career as a crazy engineer, and I have my own biz. We have trained, and planned, and worked together toward athletic, personal and family goals for a very long time. I do the Ironman, he does not.
Along the way we have figured out that each of us has the season to be the "diva" athlete. When he is training for his bike goals and events, it's his turn to call the shots. I tag along. In the heat of IM training, I'm the diva and he helps me out. All along the way, however, it's one long running total of SAUs with no one keeping score. I'm not sure the whole "banking" idea works. Sure there are some spikes for one person or the other, but give-and-take with a running ebb and flow seems to work best. Balance.
Even is your wife, hubby, or SO isn't an athlete, they can have their own "diva" season in whatever their interests are.
Ladies, I don't think I earn SAUs "that way" unless it is during the final IM 12 weeks of training.
With a non triathlon spouse it is easier for me to earn SAUs by getting my workout done when he is at work or asleep. If he wants to ride with me, I go out and do the intervals- the MS as it were- then come back and we go out together. He prefers to sleep in while I am a very early bird- so this is perfect. His endurance is not close to mine (his job is way more all consuming than mine) but I fully support his efforts to maintain some level of fitness. On weekends during in season, once my workout is done, he basically calls the shots. The rest of the year, everything is a team effort.
WAIT! Now that you mention it, I'm not sure that I EVER earn SAUs??!!!
I ride my trainer in the living room while he plays the Xbox. That way we can talk (inbetween intervals) and still do what we want. My husband is pretty layed back. We are both so busy with grad school and work that time together is precious even if we are doing different things.
Ahhh...the good old days. Sounds like you two have a sweet relationship to enjoy time together like that.
Vince
Kitma,
I had the same arrangement with my ex-wife. As long as I made the money, cleaned the house, washed/dryed/folded and put away the laundry and watched out 6 kids when she went out with the girls 2-3 nights/wk AND didn't run or ride past noon on the weekends...I would earn SAU's. Again...she's an EX. I just couldn't make it home by noon on some of the century rides
.
Happy Holidays.
Vince
ABP - you thought it meant always be pushing but really it means Always Be Planning on how to best rack up SAU's so you have a big balance when you need it. Wife doesn't keep count and I am really lucky that she is 100% supportive of my tri-style, but does not mean that I am not constantly looking for little ways to remind her that I appreciate her!