Self destructive thinking

gonnzo

Caught myself pushing a workout yesterday (trying flip turns where I have never done them before) where some sort of injury might well result. 

Conscious self "Hey, I should probably not be trying new things just now.  I might get hurt and not be able to race in 10 days". 

Evil subconscious self "Yeah, but then I wouldn't have to actually race and risk massive pain and failure..." 

When I realized where my head was going I just about choked and drown.  Had to stop and get my head straight then finish the workout.  Anybody else ever have thoughts like that??  I wonder what else I've been doing to undermine my own efforts...

chris malone

Great that you have that kind of awareness. I was whipped last year, and "forgot" my swim gear one morning. Slept in the car for 2 hours and went home. Awesome. There is all kinds of unconscious shoot yourself in the foot stuff that goes on and your head is usually trying to tell you something. Everyone slips into that space where they think they "have" to so this. But it's, of course, totally frivolous and no one has to do any of it. So don't race if you don't want to. But you know you want to.

Dave Tallo

Posted By Brian Remer on 01 Sep 2011 04:11 PM

...

When I realized where my head was going I just about choked and drown.  Had to stop and get my head straight then finish the workout.  Anybody else ever have thoughts like that??  I wonder what else I've been doing to undermine my own efforts...

I'm doing IM number 14 next week, and have had those thoughts before every race. 

trigirl1203

It is totally normal...taper does that to you. I had a similar conversation with my hamstring this morning on my run (have had chronic hammy issues). Said to it, if you REALLY give out now, you'll have an excuse. Then I remembered that goal, my "one thing". There is a reason you are doing this, and that goal of yours *and* that finishing chute is totally worth it, whether you finish in 10 hours or 16:59.

gonnzo

Thanks for the support, all! Good to know I'm not alone. Been in a great place mentally over the weekend workouts, so hopefully identifying the demon has been the key to defeating it. Bring it on!

Gordon Cherwoniak

Brian,

Yes those thoughts have entered my mind more so on the weeks leading up to my second IM.  I had hoped for more and  built up higher expectations.  In the end I did not deal with these negative thougths and have the one thing clear in my head for race day and called in in T2.  I did have some nutrition issues but stopping there really hit me hard.  Keep those thoughts to a minimum and as you have done get your head straight.

During IM you will more than likely have the "what the XXXX am I doing out here" and you need a response. 

I'm looking forward to redemtion at Lake Placid in 2012.

Gordon

Coach Patrick

All. The. Time. As endurance athletes you live on that edge; it's easy to sabotage yourself right now VS facing the true reality of what it means to give 100% your mental and physical best on race day. Don't give in...get ready to race!